They teach them to hate pretty young in Europe

Steven Gerrard and Liverpool fell to AC Milan in the Champions League Final today 2-1. We couldn't care less about that.

But we found this clip of a "cheeky little monkey" punking Gerrard. Damn those Chelsea wankers! They're nothing but Barney they is!

All right, that's enough soccer coverage for the next year.

Roy Hibbert is a smart man

Today Roy Hibbert decided he'd go back to G-Town for his senior year. This is an incredibly smart move by Hibbert. It seems like that G-Town education has certainly done him a lot of good.

Hibbert was projected to be somewhere in the range of the 8th to the 12th pick in the upcoming NBA draft. That means he'd be earning somewhere in the range of $1.4 to $1.8 million a year (with slight increases each year) for three years.

Hibbert probably paid attention to the fact that there are two big men who will be going ahead of him if he had stayed in this year's draft - Greg Oden and Yi Jianlian from China.

So why not spend another year in college? He can continue honing his conditioning and skills for another year and then be a top 3 pick in next year's draft. Reasonably competent big men always go high in the draft.

It's also makes sense economically speaking. If Hibbert is a top three pick next year, he would earn an extra $4 million plus from his rookie contract than if he had come out this year.

Although some people are worried that Hibbert might pull a Joakim Noah, I don't buy that. Hibbert has improved every year he's been at G-Town, and unlike Noah, Hibbert is a true center. It's much tougher to find a true center than a tweener forward.

Smart move Roy. Now get in the gym and start running.

-WCK

Other takes on it:
Hibbert investing brilliantly

Because we can

We know you've all seen this video before. Who hasn't. But in celebration of the Hawks getting the #3 pick in the draft, in which they'll find some way not to draft a point guard, here's this great video again to remind you of why the Hawks organization has such major problems. And Harry the Hawk, how come you're not wearing a helmet? Because he's a rebel, that's why.

It ain't easy being a Hawks fan

Atlanta didn't have to give up this year's pick to the Suns, but they didn't get a shot at Oden or Durant either.

They should probably just draft this kid instead. He provided the fans with more fun than the team.

-WCK

Not a good day for the NBA

Unless you're a fan of the Trail Blazers, the Sonics or the Spurs, Tuesday was a pretty bad day for most NBA fans. And in the long run, it could be pretty bad for the NBA as a whole.

The fact of that matter is that with Portland and Seattle locking up the first two picks in the NBA Draft, it means Oden and Durant will be headed to the great American Northwest, where watching basketball ranks below chopping wood on the list of fun things to do (although chopping wood is fairly popular).

While there will at least be no conspiracy theories about any kind of rigging of this year's draft, the fact remains that the NBA had two megastars for this year's draft who won't be going to any big time basketball markets. Also bad is the fact that Oden and Durant will spend the majority of their time playing on the west coast, meaning most people won't stay up late enough to watch many of their games. And don't even get us started about teaming up Oden with Darius Miles and Zach Randolph. Let's hope he hangs out with Brandon Roy.

Also bad was that Phoenix missed out on Atlanta's draft pick because it was a top three protected pick. So all of us hoping to see the Suns add Corey Brewer or Al Horford to the mix and challenge the Spurs next year (in a hopefully legitimate series), we're out of luck unless some major trades happen on draft day or the Suns go free agent shopping after Marion is expected to leave.

It was also disappointing to see the Bulls wind up with the number nine pick. I have no clue who'll still be around by then. Noah? Hibbert? Julian Wright? Will any of these guys help them get past the Pistons next year? Doesn't seem likely.

Combine all of this with the fact that the Spurs won yet another snoozer of a game Tuesday, and the fact that ESPN had the draft right before the game in order to try and sucker fans into watching it to beat SpongeBob Squarepants in the ratings, and what are you left with? Nothing worth watching, that's for sure. The NBA seems to be dying a slow death in front of us.

Will Oden and Durant revive basketball in the Northwest? Probably not. Will Phoenix do something to get a key player from this year's draft to get over the hurdle and into the finals? Probably not. Will Atlanta ever draft a point guard? Probably not. Will someone finally deck Bowen when he shoots one of his baseline 3s? Probably not.

So why I should I care? Why should anyone care? Stern and the league seem to be stepping all over themselves right now. If it hadn't been for the Warriors this year, would this go down as one of the worst NBA seasons ever? I just hope Oden and Durant turn out to be awesome pros. Otherwise, God help the NBA. Otherwise it'll soon be on Versus getting shut off for the Preakness.

-WCK

Other perspectives:
Draft Lottery Liquorish Lace
Well, we suppose this ruins Pitino's master plan
Celtics Lottery Bitterness...and crushing conspiracy theories

Tuesday was not a good day for Bill Simmons

There's a famous quote by Mark Twain that speaks to the dangers of expectation.

A thing long expected takes the form of the unexpected when at last it comes. -Twain

And that's what happened tonight for the Boston Celtics. With the second worst record in the NBA, it was more than apparent that Boston was banking on this draft even more than the Memphis Grizzlies (who I feel bad for). Why else would Boston give an extension to a horrible coach and more or less blatantly tank games at the end of the season? Why would Danny Ainge "accidentally" sit next to Kevin Durant's mother at the Big 12 Tournament? It was all part of a plan. The expectation was that they could get Oden or Durant.

I don't believe in karma, but I do believe that sometimes in life we are treated to completely random moments that provide a glimpse into how stupid people can be.

The Celtics shouldn't have let it come down to this, just like they did with the 1997 draft.

Now, once again, the Celtics find themselves adrift in a world of hurt. Although the luck of the draft is totally random, the Celtics getting the fifth pick somehow seems totally justified.

-WCK

Hey Vick! Ever heard of American Samoa?

As anyone who's been following the Vick dogfighting extravaganza knows, Clinton Portis recently had Vick's back, before quickly changing gears and apologizing.

But during the discussion in which Portis defended Vick's love of dogfighting, the reporter interviewing him interjected and said "But that's a felony. It's a crime."

Portis responded "That can't be too bad of a crime."

While Portis is an idiot, he was actually on to something. While dogfighting is a crime in all 50 states, it is not however a felony in all 50 states.

It is only a misdemeanor in the great states of Wyoming and Idaho. Why? I think you already know the answer to that one.

While we realize neither state has a pro football team, Vick could get off a lot easier in either of these places. Although Goodell would probably still hang him out to dry.

So how can Vick avoid the the iron fist of Goodell? By moving to American Samoa, where dog fighting is 100% legal. That's a long way from Atlanta, but sometimes you have to go the distance for the things you love.

As for the dogs, our guess is they hope Vick doesn't move.

-WCK

Special editor's note: Just in case you were saying to yourself, where can I see a dog fight and not be charged with a crime? It is actually legal to be a spectator at a dog fight in Hawaii and Georgia (What? No Mississippi? Sorry Clinton). Georgia is no surprise. Hawaii, that's pretty random.

Will the NBA Draft lottery beat tonight's game in ratings?

With the ratings continuing to be absolutely beyond abysmal for the NBA playoffs, we figure there's a reasonable possibility that the draft lottery may actually outdraw the game. We're not sure how we're going to find this out, but we're going to try.

Keep in mind, all day ESPN has been hyping both the game and the draft together - our guess is to get Memphis and Boston fans to hopefully leave their TV's on and watch the crapfest that is Jazz/Spurs. It's a ratings ploy, like putting Skin on after the Simpsons. And if you're asking what the hell was Skin, we've already proved our point.

Quite frankly, we're not going to get suckered in. As soon as the lottery ends, we're going to do something else. Like hypothesize on why San Antonio fans don't even like watching the Spurs play. There were upwards of 500 to 1000 empty seats at the arena for Game 1. At the rate basketball is going, it may soon be appearing on Versus.

-WCK

You can't please everyone

It seems today that a lot of people have a beef with King James passing the rock to Donyell Marshall in Game 1 for a open look from 3-pt land when the Cavs were down by 2 with about 6 seconds left. Apparently people such as Sir Charles and Magic believed the King should have gone in for a layup or potential dunk.

Look, let's be honest here. No one's ever going to be happy. If LeBron, who'd been bricking it up all night, missed the potential layup, everyone would be killing him for going down the lane with 3 Pistons converging on him when someone else was obviously open (like Marshall was). Plus, let's all remember that even if he had gotten fouled on the play, James isn't the best freethrow shooter.

If he instead passes the ball out, which is what he did, and Marshall misses the 3, which he did, then everyone accuses James of not taking the load upon himself to win the game.

So here's the truth, even though I would never pass the ball to Donyell Marshall (because he played for our Warriors, and we think he sucks) LeBron made the right move. You go for the throat on the road, you don't play to tie. That's common NBA knowledge, which Magic and Charles seem to have forgotten. Actually, Charles never knew this, because he has no championship rings.

The truth is that as a superstar, you're held to a different standard. Unless you hit the game winning shot or someone hits it for you, you'll be criticized.

We remember when Stephen Jackson missed a potential go-ahead 3 pointer in the waning moments of Game 1 of the Warriors/Jazz series. Did anyone freak out about S-Jax's decision? Did anyone say, why the hell is he shooting a wideopen 3? No, of course not. It made sense, go for the throat on the road, not the tie. Even if S-Jax had passed or driven for a potential layup, and the final end result had been a miss, no one would have cared.

It's simple. S-Jax isn't LeBron, so we don't hold him to as high a standard. That's the curse of being a superstar. When you hit the big shot, you're the hero. When you make the pass and your teammate hits the shot, you're still the hero for having the ability to get him that open look, even though the guy that hit the shot should probably be the hero. But when you miss, or your teammate misses - you get all the blame. It ain't fair, but it is what it is.

-WCK

That didn't go so well

First off, although we may be boycotting the Western Conference Finals, we are still watching the Eastern Conference Finals. In small doses. Very small doses.

Tonight was a golden opportunity for the Cavs to steal a game. Detroit clearly doesn't respect the Cavs at all and you could absolutely sense that from the way this game went.

And quite frankly, if LeBron plays like he did tonight, then there's no reason for the Pistons to respect the Cavs. King James played like a downtrodden serf. He shrank in the spotlight, going for a career playoff low of 10 pts. Although he also had 11 boards and 9 assists, let's be honest - the Cavs can't win when LeBron scores 10 points. The one game during the regular season that the Cavs beat the Pistons, LeBron went for over 40. He's got to score.

Now, some people might say Detroit dodged a bullet tonight. Yes and no. First of all, Detroit didn't play well and won. That's good. But while a close game like this would be a wakeup call for most teams, it never is for Detroit. That's bad. I fully expect the Pistons to take at least one or two more games off in this series. LeBron better be ready to step up when that happens.

-WCK

Hockey needs love too

It's been pretty tough for the sport of hockey lately. It reached a new low this past Saturday when NBC deemed the Sens/Sabres overtime period not worthy for TV, instead shifting to pre-race coverage of the Preakness and the newest sporting sensation: port-o-racin'.

And we're not sure this video is going to help either. It's a bunch of guys singing a ballad about the old NES game Blades of Steel. That sound you hear in the background is hockey continuing its death march to oblivion.

We shouldn't be that mean though. We always liked Blades of Steel, particularly the excessive fighting. Why the video game never translated into us liking the real game, we'll never know. It's probably because in real life hockey players don't flash multiple colors when they have the puck.

Anyway, go ahead and throw it down old school hockey style if you like. Even if you're the only one watching yourself play, you're probably still beating the ratings the NHL is getting these days.

-WCK

Not the best of years...

It hasn't been the best of NBA seasons. We had only a handful of very good teams, some terrible suspensions (including Melo's), no trade deadline action and playoff games are now getting lower ratings than SpongeBob Squarepants. Granted the Warriors beat the Mavs in the first round of the playoffs, but that's about it for season highlights. Now we're settling in for some of worst conference finals showdowns in recent memory.

So where did it all go wrong? Full Court NBA breaks it down in detail for you, a great in-depth read.