It could always be worse than the Knicks

One of the things that's admittedly hilarious about American sports is that we think we know what's a truly horrible team situation. Like the Knicks. They have a terrible owner, a terrible coach, a crazy point guard, no cap space until 2087, and they had to pay a woman employee more than $11 million because of a sexual harrassment lawsuit invloving the crappy coach. And to top it all off, the owner says the coach's job is totally safe.

All of those examples scream that the Knicks are a team is in disarray. Well, sort of.

Let's go somewhere else - like Serbia for instance - where team disarray is a bit different.

Last Friday, four high-ranking team officials of the soccer club Red Star Belgrade (which sounds more like a guerilla movement than a team), were detained by authorities. And as of Sunday, they've all been sentenced to 30 days in jail - and could go away for much longer than that. So why were they detained? Well, they failed to stop a riot that left a police officer nearly dead.

During the first weekend of December at a league match at Red Star's stadium, the fans attacked a plainclothes policeman trying to film them in the stands. The policeman fired shots in the air to keep the attackers at bay, but it didn't quite work. Several fans were arrested after beating up the cop, including one charged with attempted manslaughter.

But here's the important thing to remember. This happened right in the middle of the game, and to top it all off, Red Star Belgrade is accused of letting fans bring flares into the game, which were used during the attack. But since fan violence is frequent at Serbian stadiums, Red Star Belgrade said forget about it, and just decided to keep playing while the cop was being beaten up and flares were going off. Fantastic, where I can get tickets to the next game?

Since Red Star Belgrade actually allowed fans to bring in illegal flares, and a policeman got the business, the police were naturally a tad upset when everything was over. In fact, this situation is the first time team officials have ever been detained in Serbia as a result of fan violence.

But why in God's name would Red Star Belgrade allow fans to bring flares into the stadium? Good question. And here's the answer.

The pro-government Politika daily newspaper said the riots were inspired by Red Star officials to sidetrack a police investigation into their alleged links with organized crime and murky deals in the sale of at least 15 Red Star players to foreign teams.

Well, of course. What else were they going to do? Offer free bobble-head dolls to fans? Actually tell police the truth? Please.

So in other words, the next time you're at a Knicks game, remember it could be much worse. You could have Isiah arrested at mid-court and have a flare stuck in your ear while Nate Robinson bricks another dunk.

-WCK

Arkansas loves its Special Olympians

I've never been to Arkansas in my life, and after hearing this story, I plan to keep it that way.

On Wednesday of this past week in the state, a Special Olympics athlete got caught in a case of mistaken identity by police.

And, naturally, he got tasered.

Police were looking for a 'Travis Henderson' who had an outstanding warrant for failing to appear in court on a reckless driving charge. However, the officers flagged down Travis Henderson - Special Olympics medal winner.

The police were, of course, totally on the ball, as they disregarded Henderson's ID (who has a different birthdate than the suspect) and also called for backup. They clearly have some mean streets in Arkansas.

Incredibly, the tasering was deemed justifiable. Police claim our Special Olympics hero resisted arrest.

"(Officer Ward) O.K., don't resist..."

"(Henderson) O.K."

"(Officer Ward)...'cause you're gonna get Tased."

"(Henderson) I'm not..."

BUZZZZZZZZ! (note: I added the buzz)

Wait a second, so agreeing with police is a taserable offense? You learn something new every day.

And to top it all off, police still charged Henderson with disorderly conduct and resisting arrest even after they realized he was the wrong guy. Hey, might as well kick a Special Olympian while he's down, right?

The charges were dropped on Friday - which is kind of surprising. I half-expected Henderson to get the chair.

-WCK

The strange disappearances of three basketball players

I'm not sure strange disappearances in pro sports are unique to basketball. In fact, I'm sure they certainly aren't. But for whatever reason, pro basketball has had some truly bizarre disappearances of several athletes over time. And I'm not talking about players just leaving the game or losing their talent at the drop of a hat. I'm talking about guys literally disappearing.

The most recent bizarre disappearance involves former Washington State University player Tony Harris. In 1994, Harris, a guard, led a Cinderella Cougars team to the NCAA tournament. The team lost in the East Regional to Boston College, 67-64. Despite this, Harris never played in the NBA. After college, he played in Asia and South America. He starred in Brazil from 2000-05, earning Player of the Year honors and winning a championship for Uberlandia before retiring. But this year he decided to return to Brazil to get a "financial cushion" before the birth of his first child with his wife Lori.

Lori said her husband left Seattle for Brasilia in central Brazil on Oct. 31. She last heard from him early Nov. 4, when he spoke to her, fear in his voice, from a Brazilian taxi driver's cell phone. Two days earlier, he called and said "he didn't feel safe and that if he didn't come home now, he wasn't going to make it home," she said.

Harris said her husband had expressed concerns about people involved with the team, and was hearing upsetting rumors about himself. The basketball team's organization, she said, apparently held his passport, and her husband was trying to get to another city in Brazil where a friend could help.

And that's it. No one knows what's happened to Harris and so far no one is exactly going out of their way to help Harris' family find him.

But if you think think that's a strange tale, it's not even the strangest tale to come out of Seattle, which is where Harris hails from. By far the weirdest disappearance, maybe in sports history, is that of former Sonics player John Brisker. Brisker was a tough, bruising, and menacing player who spent time in the ABA before joining the Sonics in the early 70s. However, only a couple of years after he was cut during the 75-76 season, he pretty much inexplicably traveled to Uganda during the height of Idi Amin's reign of terror. Brisker told some of his family members he had plans to get into the import-export business. 1978 was the last time his family heard from him, which was one phone call from Kampala. After that he was never heard from again.

The legends about Brisker's disappearance are just as strange as his decision to go to Uganda.

Brisker's family said he had been invited to Uganda as a guest of Amin, a wild basketball enthusiast. One line of thinking is that Brisker was executed in Uganda. After Amin's government was overthrown in 1979, the theory goes, Brisker was shot by a firing squad of anti-Amin revolutionaries.

Another somewhat credible account is that Brisker didn't just want to go to Uganda as a guest, he actually wanted to fight for Amin. One night around 1978, former Pittsburgh Condors public relations director Fred Cranwell played back a message left on his home phone. It was a collect call from Brisker, who cryptically said he was going to Africa to fight in a war.

There's even a thought that Brisker simply became an anonymous individual in Uganda or somewhere else in Africa to begin a new life.

But perhaps the weirdest theory of all is that Brisker got on Amin's bad side, was killed, and eaten by the dictator.

Regardless of what happened, Brisker was declared legally dead in 1985 by the King County, Washington medical examiner.

The last bizarre disappearance should be somewhat familiar to those of you who grew up watching basketball in the 90s. In 2002, Bison Dele - who used to be known as Brian Williams - disappeared at sea in Tahiti along with his girlfriend and the ship's captain. Initially, no boat was recovered and the only person who made it back to land was Dele's brother, Miles Dabord (born Kevin Williams). However, after an extensive investigation that even involved the FBI, the boat was found 2 months later off the coast of Tahiti with its name plate removed and some possible bullet holes patched up. Since Dele's disappearance Dabord had also forged his brother's signature in order to buy $152,000 worth of gold under his brother's name. He had also used Dele's passport as identification. The FBI concluded that Dele, his girlfriend and the skipper were probably killed, and then thrown overboard, by Dabord.

Dabord, the only major source of information regarding the case, intentionally overdosed on insulin shortly thereafter and slipped into a coma. He died within a few weeks, effectively shutting the book on the case forever.

All three cases are truly bizarre, and while Brisker and Dele are in all likelihood dead, let's hope that Harris is found safe and sound.

-WCK

Prison and Pole-vaulting, together at last

Considering today is Guy Fawkes day, we couldn't let the day pass without a post involving prison, jail time, and the potential destruction of Britain. It seems there's a young offenders (18-21) prison in Dorset, England where inmates are learning how to vault over 13ft high bars. Naturally it's a big hit, even though Allison Stokke isn't teaching the class.

But it obviously raises a few questions. As one guy said, "It struck me as funny that prisoners are being taught to pole vault." Yes, yes it is.

I already know what you're thinking and the walls at the prison are 20ft high. So this is no big deal then, right? Um, maybe.

The warden who runs the place is hoping a future Olympic champion will emerge from the prison. Interestingly, the men's world record for pole-vaulting is just over 20ft. Seems like perfect motivation to me.

In my mind, about the only sport you could teach prisoners that's worse than pole-vaulting would probably be skeet shooting. Or shiv making.

And just to help you sleep at night, at a jail in New Mexico in 1987, seven men – including two murderers – pole-vaulted over a prison wall.

-WCK

Backup linebackers are expendable, backup QBs less so

Some of you are probably already familiar with the commotion that happened down at LSU this past Friday. Since the Tigers had the week off, that meant Friday night was all right to go out and party.

Anyway, to cut to the chase, three LSU football players, Derrick Odom, Jeremy Benton and Ryan Perrilloux were all involved in a brawl at the Varsity nightclub.

Odom is also accused of smashing a car window. And Perrilloux, well there's a real a question about what else he did. From the official police report:

Much later, on the night of the 26th, nearly 24 hours after the original fight, an employee of The Varsity reported for the first time, to an off-duty officer, that he was leaving the Varsity when the original fight was going on, when a man he believed to be Ryan Perrilloux ran up and pointed a gun at him and his girlfriend.

The employee, however, couldn't identify Perrilloux in a photo line up. Perrilloux also supposedly passed a lie-detector test in which he said he never had a gun.

Regardless of the gun issue, reports say Odom and Perrilloux were the primary people keeping the fight going. Both have some past scrapes with the law to say the least.

Perrilloux was cited by Baton Rouge police last spring for attempting to enter a downtown gambling casino with false identification that said he was 21. He was also questioned by federal authorities late last year for his tertiary role in a counterfeiting ring in his hometown of LaPlace.

Odom was arrested twice in recent months on misdemeanor charges — one for damaging an automobile of a woman and the other for damaging an automobile and threatening the owner and his father.

Yesterday Odom was charged with a misdemeanor for smashing a car window after the brawl. He was soon kicked off the team by Les Miles. Benton was also kicked off the team.

Perrilloux, however, will remain on the team but Miles says he will not play Saturday when LSU faces Alabama.

Odom getting kicked off the team is understandable. He's been charged with yet another misdemeanor. It also helps that he's a redshirt freshman linebacker who's seen no action this year.

But Benton is harder to understand. He hasn't been charged with anything, just like Perrilloux. Yet now he's been kicked off of the team.

So what's the difference between Benton and Perrilloux? Benton's a backup junior linebacker who's only seen action in 4 games this year. Perrilloux's going to be the starting QB next year.

I know this isn't surprising, but it sure speaks volumes. It continues to hammer home the point that if you're an important component of a team (and play a real critical position), you can get away with quite a lot. If you're not that important and do basically the same stuff, well, expect to get the door.

It also says that a lot of football teams - and coaches - put winning above everything else, including character and academics. I'm looking at you, Les Miles.

But in the end, this seems to be the norm rather than the exception. Which when you truly stop and think about it, is rather depressing.

-WCK

Vancouver is not your brother's keeper

When you host the Olympics, one of the things you want to do is tidy up your city just before everyone comes to town. That way people will see how clean and great your city is and will hopefully come back to visit again some day.

But it's tough cleaning up a city, especially when smelly homeless junkies are out doing heroin and crack all over your streets. So what do you do when you're looking to cut the homeless problem in your city by 50% by the time the Olympics come to town? Why, you stick said homeless drug addicts on a one-way plane out of town is what you do.

Yep, Vancouver is in the midst of seriously considering a plan to fly homeless and drug addicted individuals out of the city in time for the 2010 Olympics. That's because Vancouver - despite having the reputation of a clean city - has what a U.N. official recently called one of the world's worst slums in an affluent city. And the plan to send people off on planes wasn't cooked up by some nut. It was devised by the Chief of Police, the Civil City Commissioner, and a member of the Vancouver Board of Trade. Classy.

The plan is to collect a ton of donated frequent flyer miles and then "send people back to where they came from." Which I believe would be the gutter...of some other city. Truly a problem solving plan if ever there was one.

And just so everyone knows it's serious, the chairman of the Vancouver Board of Trade has already donated 100,000 miles. Because those miles definitely get to the root of the problem.

If you think this is bad (or maybe you think it's good), Atlanta did something similar in 1996 just before the Olympics. They rounded up as many homeless people as they could find, threw them on buses, drove them to the edge of the city and then threatened them with six months of jail time if they returned. Sort of like Rambo, except no homeless people came back and shot up a police station. Yet.

But hey, at least homeless people in the US and Canada get free plane trips and bus rides when the Olympics come to town. I have a feeling they won't be doing that in China.

-WCK

Pro athletes are scofflaws too

It looks like a couple of Pittsburgh Steelers could be in trouble soon. The Allegheny County Court in Pittsburgh just released a list of 52,626 unpaid summary violations issued since the beginning of 2004, including parking and moving violations issued by police.

Steelers linebacker Larry Foote Jr. appears on the list three times, including citations for reckless driving and improper passing. Offensive lineman Max Starks is listed six times for various parking violations. According to Mondesi's House, Plaxico Burress has two citations as well. Athletes have to pay for traffic violations? What the hell is this world coming to?!

Foote, Starks and Burress have until Nov. 20 to request a hearing or plead guilty. Failure to respond, and a judge will issue an arrest warrant. I wonder what Goodell would do if that happened. He'd probably shoot them all on the spot.

I'm just disappointed Ben "Helmet" Roethlisberger didn't make the list. I have a feeling he's probably not the world's safest driver.

-WCK

The Duke rape case may be over, but it lives on in lawsuits

The Duke rape case may be over in one form, but other parts of it just refuse to die. It seems that the former coach of the team, Mike Pressler, is now suing the school.

Pressler's lawsuit apparently stems from a financial settlement the school reached earlier this year with him, although school officials did not give details Friday.

The Herald-Sun of Durham reported Friday on its Web site that his lawsuit alleges the university broke the terms of the confidential settlement when university senior vice president John Burness made disparaging comments about him.

The Charlotte Observer reported that the suit said one of the comments was made April 9th in Newsday, when Burness said the difference between Pressler and current lacrosse coach John Danowski was "night and day." The second comment came in June, when Burness told The Associated Press "it was essential for the team to have a change of leadership in order to move forward."

Meanwhile, Duke's student newspaper - the Duke Chronicle - has decided not to rush to judgment.

Indeed, at this point, we know very little about this suit in particular and don't pretend to know much about the intricate legal processes at play. We need to give both the University and Pressler's attorneys time to present their arguments before reaching conclusions.

The paper was similarly lauded for not rushing to judgment during the original case.

I'm not exactly sure whether the comments the Observer reported on constitute "disparaging" or not. I'm not a lawyer. But unless Pressler was ordering his players to have insane parties, it would appear that Burness made some seriously stupid comments.

I never like to bring out personal stories, because I know you don't want to read them, but I think it's valid here. Having played football in college, our coach always said after a game, "Be safe tonight" and then half the guys on the team would wake up Sunday in another state with lampshades on their heads. That's not the coach's fault. And while I can understand that you'd need to let a coach go after a situation like what happened at Duke - provided you give him a financial settlement - you shouldn't take shots at him in the press. I seriously doubt Pressler ever told his players to celebrate wins with strippers. And now Duke might soon be paying for what was a clearly avoidable mistake.

-WCK

Mike Vick might have a lighter wallet after today

Most of us were aware that the Atlanta Falcons were going to eventually try and see if they could get back a significant portion of Mike Vick's $130 million contract.

Well, that day is today.

The Atlanta Falcons will try to convince an arbitrator the team deserves a refund on up to $22 million in bonus money paid to Vick. The Falcons are expected to contend that Vick knew he was in violation of the contract when he signed the $130 million deal in December of 2004, and that he used proceeds from the deal to fund his dogfighting operation.

The Falcons will be represented Thursday by team president and general manager Rich McKay and three more team officials in the private hearing in Philadelphia.

Attorneys representing the NFL Players Association will argue against the Falcons’ claim. Which means Vick might as well just give the money back now.

In all seriousness though, it's going to be exceedingly difficult for the Falcons to get the $22 million back. According to the NFL’s collective bargaining agreement, bonus money earned can not be returned.

Despite that fact, the Falcons are going to give it a try. Frankly I think it'll be hard to prove that Vick is aware of anything, let alone violations of his own contract.

But hey, most people thought Isiah Thomas was going win his sexual harassment case. And we all know what happened there.

-WCK

So did they kill Vick's dogs or what?

I'm coming for you Vick!!!

Some of you may remember back in August there was a story about how Vick's dogs were likely to be euthanized by court order. Well, it's October now. What the hell happened?

Luckily there's finally a decent story in this sordid mess, and Vick might want to start watching his back.

All but one of the dogs seized in the Vick dog fighting case will be placed with families or put in a "sanctuary," where they will interact with people to overcome their fear and lack of socialization, according to a court order filed Monday.

I know I'd pay money to see what happens when Vick runs into Killer and Spike one afternoon.

The one unlucky dog "has a history biting humans" (and probably ripping other dogs to shreds) so it'll be drowned personally by Vick. No, I kid. It'll be euthanized. Then shot by Vick.

Anyway, I always love the official version of how the government justifies euthanizing a dog, so here you go:

U.S. Attorney Chuck Rosenberg on the dog -- identified as number 2621 -- "exhibited intense aggression to humans to the point where the evaluation could not safely be completed."

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that the same thing people said about Marcus Vick?

-WCK

Tractor Traylor gets sentenced for aiding a drug kingpin

The Tractor Traylor saga isn't quite the same as the Vick saga, primarily because Traylor isn't as well known as Vick. But it's still interesting nonetheless.

Traylor's name was used, of his own accord, to make it appear that he purchased two Detroit rental properties several years ago. The properties actually were owned by his cousin Quasand Lewis, a convicted drug trafficker and money launderer, according to federal prosecutors.

When Lewis was finally busted by federal authorities in 2004, he had sold an estimated $178 million in marijuana and cocaine in metro Detroit and had associates with suspected links to nearly a dozen murders and four fire-bombed houses, according to federal prosecutors. They declared Lewis as the kingpin of a massive and ruthless organized crime ring and deemed him Michigan's biggest pot dealer, perhaps ever.

It was never really determined why Traylor helped Lewis, aside from the fact that they're family. Traylor wound up helping him launder about $4 million.

Anyway, Traylor pleaded guilty in January to a charge of aiding and assisting in the preparation of a false tax return. He could have been sentenced to up to 14 months in federal prison.

Instead, Traylor received three years of probation on Friday.

He'll serve the first three months of his probation in a halfway house and the next three months in home confinement. Since he's currently playing pro ball in Puerto Rico - which is a long, long fall from being the 6th pick in the 1998 NBA Draft - his sentence will be served in the offseason.

Although Traylor's specific story is different from Vick's, it still begs the same question, why in the hell do some athletes do stuff like this? It's sort of depressing to watch certain pro athletes continually get pulled down by some of the people they happen to associate themselves with. We've seen this a million times in sports, from Vick to Pacman to Pete Rose.

Whatever, it's not like it's ever going to change anyway. Hope you're enjoying the legal cock fights in Puerto Rico, Tractor. Maybe when Vick gets out of prison he can join you there.

-WCK

News Alert: NFL player sued by stripper is not Pacman Jones

I don't know where you go for your news, maybe CNN, maybe whatever paper is in the bathroom stall. I, however, go to Stripper News - a site covering all stripper, hooker, dancer and prostitute related news. Some kind fellow simply posts stories from all over the world about what's going on in stripper land. Naturally athletes tend to show up in about 50% of the stories.

Needless to say I was surprised recently to see that Packers player Al Harris is being sued by a stripper. I was surprised mainly because Al Harris isn't Pacman Jones.

It seems investigators determined that Harris and a stripper had sexual contact in a private room at the Cheetah Pompano Beach in Florida in April 2005. But, citing inconsistent evidence and conflicting witness statements, Broward County prosecutors decided not to pursue charges against Harris.

Needless to say, the stripper wasn't pleased with this result, and filed a lawsuit on Monday against both Harris and the strip club. One small problem may be that surveillance cameras in the club's private room were not functioning during the incident. That sure seems to happen a lot at strip clubs for some strange reason.

I should really say something here like strippers are people too, but who am I kidding, we all know they aren't. Maybe this will be the thing that finally puts a cramp in the Packers style. Or maybe the Packers will just come back to earth because they really aren't that good anyway.

-WCK

Taser week comes to a less than shocking close

It's been quite a week for taserings, and if you somehow thought "Maybe I can make it to the weekend before someone gets tasered again" then you thought wrong.

Junior linebacker Geno Hayes and senior fullback Joe Surratt of Florida State were arrested early Friday at a bar called Potbelly's near the campus. Police said Hayes had to be subdued with a Taser and Surratt struck a police officer. Both have been suspended.

Officers were on duty outside the bar looking for underage drinkers when they noticed a man later identified as Hayes screaming profanities and waving his arms, a police report said. When officers tried to talk to him, Hayes became aggressive.

Hayes was pulled away by his friends, but he resisted when officers then tried to handcuff him, leading an officer to stun him with his Taser, police said.

This isn't good news for Florida State, seeing as Hayes is the team's second leading tackler. But it's great news if you enjoy reading about people getting tasered.

Anyway, Hayes now joins the wonderful fraternal order of athletes who've been tasered. Some members include: former Vikings wideout Travis Taylor (nightclub incident), Dale Davis (hotel lobby freakout), hockey stars/goons Bob Probert and Rudy Poeschek (the latter for driving over lawns and mailboxes while his five-year-old daughter was in his car), Maurice Clarett (vodka induced rampage), DerMarr Johnson (for getting his mac on), fromer Bengal A.J. Nicholson (hiding in the bushes while drunk in college), Scott Olsen (drunk driving then fighting cops), and former Dolphin Fred Evans (had to be tasered TWICE, and still managed to bite a cop).

But that aside, it's good to see more athletes getting in on the recent Taser action, rather than just douchebag college kids and jackass rednecks. I was afraid point guard Levance Fields of Pitt was going to be the only athlete Tasered this week.

I'm not going to hit you with any of the Taser videos you're expecting. I'll just let you listen to this guy who advises you take an ass-whupping over the Taser.


-WCK

The British like beating their coaches, literally

Every time I start thinking American sports fans are getting a little too rambunctious, I turn to BBC News to have them inform me that the fans across the pond are actually much, much worse.

And of course today is no exception.

It seems that Sir Alex Ferguson (yes, that means he's a knight), who is the manager of Manchester United, was on his way to attend a 9/11 charity event in London on Monday to raise money for families of those killed in the terrorist attacks......when he was attacked by a man at a train station. According to The Mirror, the guy was "yelling football-related abuse." Oh you classy English soccer fans. You couldn't possibly be more subtle.

A British Transport Police spokesman confirmed that the 65-year-old manager suffered leg injuries. Sir Alex, however, still attended the event. Why? Because he's a f*cking soldier, that's why. No, seriously I salute him for attending the event.

In all honesty, I find it amazing this doesn't happen more often. Nick Saban should probably have been killed about 32 times by now.

-WCK

Want some pit bulls?

Man, irony sure is great.

When the Feds raided Michael Vick's property in April they wound up finding 53 live pit bulls still on the premises. Seeing as the dogs are evidence of the dogfighting ring, they were all seized. In a rather interesting legal loophole, since the dogs are now involved in a civil case, the only way they can get be released is if someone claims them.

Shockingly, no one has, not even Mr. John Lee Riches.

While that's not sursprising, here's what is. If someone doesn't claim those dogs soon, all 53 of them are going to be euthanized. That makes perfect sense. Wait, no it doesn't.

The legal situation is such. The dogs - not Vick - are now part of a civil complaint filed by federal prosecutors that does not name Vick and is separate from the criminal case against him. But it does state the pit bulls were part of the dogfighting operation known as "Bad Newz Kennels," which Vick and three buddies are accused of operating.

The government filed three public civil forfeiture notices in a Richmond newspaper to publicize the dogs' confiscation, and the deadline for claims on the dogs is 30 days after the appearance of the final notice, filed July 24. That sets the dogs up for lethal injection pretty soon. A federal judge will make the final call on what happens to them.

Excellent. So Vick will go to prison for killing eight dogs, and now rather than try and rehab the leftover dogs, the government will just kill all 53 of them. I'm not sure what the moral of the story is here. I think it's that to be safe, you should always kill dogs. That sounds right.

-WCK

Pacman's legend continues to grow

The saga of Pacman has taken yet another bizarre new twist. According to USA Today, New York nurse Natalie Jones, who was shot in the head (meaning grazed) during the famed Minxx scuffle in Las Vegas involving Pacman and his posse, has sued our hero and the company (strip club) she says hired him to throw thousands of dollars at the strippers.

Wait what? Yes, that's right. Natalie Jones claims in her suit filed Aug. 14 that Pacman had "entered into a contract" with the Harlem Knights exotic dancer group, based in Houston, to throw thousands of $1 bills on stage at the Minxx for about 40 dancers. Why a Houston strip club would pay Pacman to do something like this in Vegas at another strip club is beyond me. And the Las Vegas police apparently agree, seeing as they said yesterday they have not found evidence of such a contract.

The woman is still suing Pac for time she spent recovering in the hospital, of which there is some disagreement.

But that's not important. What is important is that thanks to intense internet research, we managed to track down the Harlem Knights strip club web page and their MySpace page. And lo and behold, the strip club actually has a daily buffet. So maybe Pacman was telling the truth after all.

Touche indeed Mr. Pacman. Your move Mr. Goodell.

-WCK

Vick and Goodell - A frightening game of chicken

I already wrote a bit about this over at Epic Carnival, but what I wrote over there was basically the straight news angle. Basically, the only thing keeping Michael Vick from agreeing to a plea bargain is he wants to find out what the NFL will do if he pleads guilty.

In other words, he wants to know this: If I plead guilty, can I still eventually play football down the line?

I can't blame Vick for wanting to know this at all. Because let's be honest, there's no reason for him to agree to the plea bargain if it means Goodell will suspend him for life from football - which is always an outside possiblity.

By the same token, the leaking of this information (which I think was a calculated move) that Vick wants some news from the NFL now puts the onus on Goodell. Now certainly you can say Goodell has nothing to worry about, he's not the one facing a Friday deadline.

Well, in some ways he is. Goodell has come down quick and hard on players such as Pacman Jones, who still hasn't been convicted of anything serious. And even guys like Chris Henry and Tank Johnson, although they've done some dangerous things, haven't done anything quite in Vick's territory.

Goodell has some serious decisions to make. The first is should he let Michael Vick know what the NFL's stance will be if Vick pleads guilty. Goodell has to realize that football is Vick's life. And if Vick is seriously contemplating risking everything here, you could argue Goodell owes Vick at least a straight up answer by Friday about his football career.

There's also the question of does Goodell let a guy who has pled guilty (and will likely go to jail even if he pleads) eventually come back into the league? There's certainly a precedent for this, Jamal Lewis being the most recent example. But Goodell has been much harder on players than Tagliabue ever was.

This leaves Goodell in the unenviable position of does he risk not saying anything to Vick at all - and potentially watch Vick go to trial, get convicted, and go to jail for 3+ years. Or does he provide the groundwork that would ultimately allow a convicted felon back into the league in the future - which to a degree destroys the groundwork he's laid with Pacman and the like.

The bottom line here is both men are in very difficult positions at this exact moment in time - seeing as they're both fighting for something that defines them. For Vick it's football, for Goodell it's his league. It'll be awful interesting to see how this game of chicken plays out.

-WCK

Vick has to plead guilty now and his lawyers are setting it up

It appears that Michael Vick, having had all his buddies turn against him, has decided to pack it in and plead guilty before he gets hit with even more charges next week. Here is the full article that just appeared on the Atlanta Journal Constitution Web site. It's written by D. Orlando Ledbetter and Bill Rankin, who have been all over this case since it started.

Considering all his co-defendants flipped on him, this seems like the only rational thing for Vick to do. Minimize the damage before he gets hit with even more charges. There's also no way Vick's lawyers are going to let him go to trial at this point. It'd be literally insane considering the prosecution can throw witness after witness up on the stand to kill Vick.

Even if he pleads guilty, he still could face real jail time (likely one year) and could get a suspension that makes Pacman's look short. It also puts a stake through the heart of any marketability Vick thought he had left. Gotta say, this is a pretty bad end for Vick. And it's basically just starting.

Michael Vick's attorneys are engaged in plea negotiations with federal prosecutors and the Falcons quarterback could reach an agreement before new dogfighting charges are handed down next week, according to a person with knowledge of the negotiations.

The negotiations follow news that two more of Vick's three co-defendants are scheduled to enter guilty pleas later this week as part of a deal with prosecutors.

Collins Spencer, a spokesman for Vick's lawyers, declined to comment Tuesday on any possible negotiations.

He added that Vick did not meet with his attorneys last night but said they will have a conference call with Vick this morning and may have an announcement this afternoon. Spencer did not indicate what the announcement would be.

On Monday Spencer said the legal team was "very surprised" by the pleas from Purnell Peace and Quanis Phillips and said they would not affect plans to move forward toward a Nov. 26 trial.

Vick's lead attorney, Billy Martin, could not be reached for comment.

If the announcement is that Vick has reached a plea agreement, the embattled star quarterback is expected to be sentenced to some time in prison, according to federal sentencing guidelines.

Vick's motivation to enter a guilty plea is likely fueled by the U.S. Attorney's Office announcement last month that it will seek a new "superseding" indictment against Vick by the end of August. With the cooperation of Vick's three co-defendants, there will likely be new, and more specific, allegations against Vick. The federal grand jury in Richmond is expected to hand up that indictment sometime early next week.

If Vick can reach an agreement by the end of this week, he would not have to answer to any additional charges.

This week, Vick learned that in the criminal justice system, friendship only goes so far.

On Monday, guilty plea hearings were scheduled for two of his co-defendants and long-time associates. Peace, 35, of Virginia Beach, has a plea hearing scheduled for Thursday in U.S. District Court in Richmond at 9 a.m., while Phillips, 28, of Atlanta, has a plea hearing set for Friday at the same time. The hearings showed up Monday on U.S. District Court Judge Henry E. Hudson's docket.

The third co-defendant, Tony Taylor, 34, of Hampton pleaded guilty July 30 and agreed to cooperate with prosecutors in their case against Vick. Just days earlier, Taylor had joined Vick and the others in pleading not guilty.

Attorneys for both Peace and Phillips declined to comment Monday.

"There's no telling until the actual pleas, but this doesn't sound like good news for Michael Vick," said Kent Alexander, once the U.S. attorney in Atlanta and now Emory University's general counsel. "Usually, if people plead guilty early in a case they may be cooperating with the government. That's what it sounds like here."

A federal grand jury indicted the men last month on a single count of conspiracy to cross state lines to engage in illegal gambling; to sponsor a dog in an animal fighting venture; and to buy, transport and receive dogs for animal fighting.

They face up to five years in prison and $250,000 in fines, but defendants often receive more lenient punishment when they accept responsibility and enter guilty pleas.

A 13-page statement of facts Taylor signed with prosecutors last month says Vick, Peace and Phillips set up a business called "Bad Newz Kennels" in rural Surry County, Va., to raise and train pit bulls for dogfights.

It also says the men gambled on the fights in Virginia and several other states and that Vick almost exclusively funded the dogfighting operation and gambling monies.

At various times, Taylor, Peace and Phillips executed dogs they didn't think would fight well by shooting them, the statement says. The indictment issued earlier in July said Vick also executed dogs.

The plea deals for Taylor, Peace and Phillips emerged after federal prosecutors announced at their arraignment hearing last month that they would be seeking a superseding indictment, meaning they could name additional charges and defendants in the case. That indictment is expected to be announced before the end of this month.

Vick's jury trial is scheduled for Nov. 26, deep into the Falcons' schedule. The Falcons will have played 11 of their 16 regular-season games by then. Vick will remain free until the trial, but his availability to appear on field is unclear. The NFL barred Vick, with pay, from being with the team pending the outcome of its own investigation.

A call to Vick's agent, Joel Segal, was not returned Monday. The Falcons declined to comment on the latest developments in Vick's case.

NFL commissioner Roger Goodell is expected to make a decision on Vick's future in a few weeks. Goodell said he is waiting for a report from investigator Eric Holder before rendering a verdict, according to a league spokesman. No timetable has been set for Goodell's decision, NFL vice president of public relations Greg Aiello said.

Tailback Warrick Dunn, who spoke to Vick recently, said Falcons players are already of the mindset that they'll have to play without him.

"Mike is going to be missed, and he has been missed, but at the same time, you have to go on," he said.

Should Holder's report lead Goodell to determine Vick violated the NFL's player conduct policy, he could issue a suspension. Holder's report also could show that Vick did not violate the policy and that no league-ordered suspension or other discipline is warranted.

A high-ranking NFL team official said Goodell likely would meet with Vick or his legal representation before levying any suspension. Such a meeting has yet to take place.

Falcons owner Arthur Blank and president and general manager Rich McKay have said they had enough information to lead them to draw up papers to suspend Vick for four games — the maximum a team can suspend a player for disciplinary reasons. The league could suspend Vick for a year.

Blank and McKay also said there were discussions about cutting Vick.

Coach Bobby Petrino said Monday he had not been told of any developments from the NFL regarding a decision on Vick.

"I'm not aware of any recent updates on this situation," Petrino said.

"We've been proceeding as if — we have to — he's not going to be here, and we're doing the best we can at that."

-WCK

Tim Donaghy loves tennis

There's been a lot of bad press lately for major American pro sports and cycling, but at least tennis seemed to be doing ok.

That is until Friday.

Officials yesterday began investigating suspicious betting patterns on a Thursday match in which No. 4-ranked Nikolay Davydenko of Russia retired with an injury against No. 87-ranked Martin Arguello of Argentina at an ATP tournament in Poland.

The British online gambling company Betfair voided all bets Friday placed on Thursday's second-round match at the Prokom Open in Sopot.

Betfair said it received about $7 million in bets on the match, which is 10 times the usual amount, and most of the money was on Arguello to win, even after Davydenko won the first set 6-2.

Arguello went on to win the second set 6-3 and was up 2-1 in the third set when Davydenko withdrew after he said he aggravated a left foot injury.

"Normally I try to fight to the end but it was very painful and I may have done even more damage by trying to finish the match," Davydenko said Thursday after the match. "Since the beginning of Monday I've had a problem with my left toes. Today that became a problem with my foot."

He was also backed up Arguello.

"I saw Davydenko playing very well the first set, and I saw also that he had problems with his feet, and that was true, he was not inventing that, so it's difficult to suspect him," Arguello said.

It may be impossible to tell if Davydenko was taking a dive or not, since it was known before the match that he would be playing with an injury. He's also lost his last three first round matches in tournaments and there were apparently no patterns of irregular betting in any of those matches. Those losses seem to be due to the lingering injury issues. So either Davydenko's been throwing matches at an extraordinary pace, or more likely, people have just keyed in to his worsening condition.

Regardless of the pending situation, considering all the bad press that's going on in sports right now this was about the last thing tennis needed.

-WCK

The Ben Roethlisberger impersonator is back

So you may remember some guy named Brian Jackson pretended to be Ben Roethlisberger for a while back in 2005 to help pick up chicks. Anyway, it didn't work out so well and he was fined $300 and served 30 days in jail.

Well, he's back, and this time it's a bit more serious. Seems Jackson went around saying he was Pittsburgh tight end Jerame Tuman and bilked a woman out of $3,200.

Excellent. Maybe everyone in prison will believe you're a Pittsburgh Steeler. You better hope so.

Anyway, considering this is the second time this has happened (or third if you count the fact that Jackson also pretended to be Roethlisberger's backup Brian St. Pierre), maybe they better look into sending this guy to a place that doesn't have any football teams nearby. Like the Mojave Desert.

-WCK