Tiger takes major dumps

This was passed along to us by a friendly reader and maybe you don't want to see it, or maybe you do. I'm not sure what gets you off. But anyway, this is Tiger, mid-round, taking a dump at the US Open before teeing off. He of course later took a more figurative dump by losing to Angel Cabrera. This video may be the only proof we ever have that Woods is human.

What's great is that there's a crowd gathered around the toilet, and Woods has a security detail. You know you've made it when you can't even take a dump without intriguing people.

-WCK

Tiger Woods attempts to be funny

I still fully believe Tiger is a cyborg and totally incapable of comprehending the human emotion known as laughter, but he tries hard here and succeeds to a degree. He does a decent impression of Charles Barkley's hideous swing.

-WCK

Proof that Woody Austin suffers from brain damage

I really could care less about golf, and personally I think Tiger is a cyborg, but I'm doing this post anyway because I'm sure one or two of you golf WASPs will love this. Me, I'm a WIC. White Irish Catholic.

Anyway, remember what Woody Austin said after Tiger beat him at the PGA?

"It just happens that he scored better. You can't throw away that many opportunities when you are trying to win a big golf tournament. He took advantage; I didn't. Does that mean he played better than me or he's better than me? I don't agree with that."

I thought to myself, how could he say something that dumb? The proof is in this video from 1997 friends.

-WCK

"Don't put the baby in the microwave"

This great video of various pro golfers and people in the sports industry giving Tiger Woods advice on his new baby comes courtesy of The Dude Abides and BogTV. Some of the advice these people give is beyond classic.

If you want to read Dan Steinberg's original column on it, you can find that here.

-WCK

Tiger gets closer to the Golden Bear, but in a different way

Tiger came up frustratingly short again Sunday in a Major, losing to Angel Cabrera at the U.S. Open. Thus continues the rather bizarre inability of Tiger to win a Major in which he is not in the lead or tied for the lead entering the final round.

Even though Tiger didn't get any closer to Nicklaus on Sunday in terms of Majors won, he actually did get closer to Niklaus in another category. Second-place finishes in Majors.

Everyone knows that Nicklaus owns the record for most Majors in golf history with 18. But a lot fewer people know that he also finished second or tied-for-second in an astounding 19 Majors as well. With a few extra lucky bounces, it's conceivable Nicklaus could have won 22 or 23 Majors. If he had had Robert Horry's luck he might have won 30.

And get a load of these stats. During the 1970s alone, Nicklaus finished in the top 5 in 31 out of 40 Majors. He also made the top-10 in an astounding 73 Majors during his career. That's over 18 straight years of finishing in the top-10 in Majors. Woods hasn't even been on the Tour for 18 years. Woods also only has 26 top-10 finishes in Majors at this point in his career.

While it does seem inevitable that Woods will win 19 or more Majors at some point, it's hard to imagine he could possibly surpass Nicklaus in 2nd place finishes and top-10 finishes at Majors.

Tiger Woods may some day be the greatest golfer in terms of Majors won, but there's still a very legitimate argument to be made that Nicklaus was a superior golfer to Woods in terms of sheer consistency in Majors.

-WCK