Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Salty D's Rant of the Week: Boston Red Sox Fans

As always, here's the rant of the week folks. It's decisive, uncompromising, and rude. Just like Max Power.

Okay,

So, because last week I got accused of having a bias against Yankees fans everyone just assumed I was a Red Sox fan. Are you fucking kidding me? First of all, yes, I do hate non-NY area Yankees fans and I don't care if you're from Zimbabawe or Idaho, there are other teams to love and loving the Yankees from any other part of the country or world makes you a piece of shit. Period. I have never said a damn thing about Yankees fans from NY.

That being said, the only reason that Red Sox fans have been relevant for the past 80-some years is because the Yankees have kept them relevant. If ESPN and everyone else didn't blow up the Curse, which really most the rest of the country could really give a shit about, would anyone even care that the Red Sox finally won a World Series? I doubt it...

As a result, the clear second place winner for most annoying fan-base (and increasingly approaching #1 every day) is EVERY Boston Red Sox fan. As opposed to Yankees fans, I don't give a shit if you live in Guatemala, Cameroon, or next to Fenway Park, you all suck.... and the funny thing is that the rest of the country feels the same way. Anyone who has been to any game that the Red Sox play in outside Fenway are subjected to these retards showing up with Red Sox caps on, frequently with odd signs that just make everyone uncomfortable, and with an expression on their face that says "please, just fuck me up. I am going to be as annoying and lame as possible until someone just punches me in the face, please be that person." And trust me, I have had first-hand experience with this involving friends, and it never ends well. Let's just say if you are showing up at an A's/Yankees playoff game wearing a Red Sox hat and trying to start some shit, you will end up in bad shape... and deservedly so.

So, Red Sox Fan, do Salty D a favor and punch yourself in your face... you'll save some poor soul from having to do it himself and finally take some responsibility for your own behavior... Cheers!

--Salty D

6 comments:

Wormfather said...

So true, so true.

Jarrett said...

Would you then agree that the Orioles are well on their way to a curse, worthy of love and compassion from ESPN as well?

Anonymous said...

Okay, I'll say this once and once only: not ALL Sox fans are asshats. I know the breed you're talking about and agree wholeheartedly. But there are more of us out there than you notice, primarily because the non-asshat fans don't make spectacles of ourselves. Just like anyother group, don't judge the whole for the sins of a few.

Dan W said...

I needed this. Thank you.

There's nothing I hate more than going to Jacobs Field and seeing someone with a Red Sox hat on when we are playing the White Sox, Tigers, Royals, etc. And when Boston comes to town, jesus... It's a good thing they beefed up security measures at all sporting venues.

Mac G said...

As an Orioles fan, thank you for that Salty Dog. Go Watch the HBO series about the curse they ran a few years back. Purely Pathetic. Or go ask Bill Buckner his opinion of the Chowder Heads. Massholes make NFL fans at game seem sane.

Dave. B said...

It is so easy for people to bash Red Sox and Yankee fans. Are they annoying? Heck yea. Do i dislike being associated with them? You know it. But are they the worst fans in baseball? Hell no. Why don't people complain about Devil Ray, Marlins, or Royals fans? They can't even fill 1/2 their stadiums. At least Red Sox fan support their team. Maybe Indians fans should be more mad at themselves that they can't overpower Sox fans in Cleveland. Honestly, its more a statment about how pathetic other teams fans are than how annoying Sox fans are. You will never see more of the opposing teams fans in Fenway or Yankee stadium.

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