The Global Icon must be pissed he wasn't the first athlete to do this.
Humorless Chelsea midfielder Frank Lampard has just gotten his own cellphone TV channel through mobile operator Orange. The idea behind this travesty is to get more people watching TV on their cellphones, and also to create an astonishing increase in traffic accidents. Two excellent goals.
So what's going to be airing on this channel? Hopefully epic soccer games, hot soccer groupies, crazy fans, and barroom fisticuffs - all narrated by Lampard.
It will include Frank's own video diaries filmed in the last two seasons at Stamford Bridge, Chelsea's training ground and Frank's house. There's also guest interviews with his dad, his cousin, and a rugby player. Oh, and you'll get to see Frank's pets.
Well thank God I at least get to see his pets. But overall, I'm pretty disappointed. I was hoping to see Lampard make it rain on my cellphone TV. But I'm not so sure they even know what that is over in England.