Your right arm is gay

Today is tattoo day here at the Rate, in case you couldn't already tell that. This story is great because it involves beer, bad decisions, tattoo parlors, and Thailand. Combine those four things and hilarity always ensues. And probably Hepatitis.

Anyway, a diehard Australian Rules Football football fan was in Thailand last week and decided he wanted to get a tattoo of his favorite team, the Geelong Cats. He decided the proper way to go about getting said tattoo was to drink 15 beers to "ease his nerves before the tattoo was applied." Of course.

To be sure the tattooist got it right, he wrote down exactly what he wanted on his right and left arms, under the headlines ''right arm'' and ''left arm." On his right arm he wanted the Geelong symbol and the words "Day Premiers 2007" and on the left "Night Premiers 2006."

Simple enough. However, the tattooist started in on his work and tattooed in "Right Arm" first. Naturally you'd probably stop right there. But our drunk hero decided to keep on going. I mean, you can't expect a Thai tattooist to get everything right.

"My son-in-law came in . . . and said, 'You know they've written 'Right Arm?'"

"I said, 'You're joking!"

"I said, 'Well now he's done that he might as well do the left arm as well."

That turned out to be a bad decision, not only because he now has "Right Arm" and "Left Arm" tattooed onto his arms, but "Day Premiers 2007" turned into "Gay Premiers 2007."

The man said there was some light at the end of the tunnel, with the tattoo being of such poor quality that it appeared to already be peeling and was almost indecipherable anyway. Hey, whatever helps you sleep at night buddy. Your right arm is still gay.

-WCK